Wedding planning is an exciting, fun, and sometimes stressful part of ones life. While it’s easy to get caught up in the planning and celebrations leading up to your wedding. It is important to remember that your wedding is the start of your life with your fiancé. Having beautiful decorations, the perfect attire and great food are important.However, It is more important to have a beautiful lasting marriage with your spouse. The wedding is just one day, your marriage is the rest of your life. As much attention if not more needs to be paid to planning a wonderful marriage as it does a wonderful wedding.
Planning a beautiful marriage and beautiful wedding do not need to be mutually exclusive. You can use planning your wedding to help you plan and build a strong foundation for your marriage. To plan the wedding of both of your dreams you need communication, collaboration and compromise. These are the same elements you’ll need to a have strong successful marriage. Here is how you can use planning your wedding to help build a strong marriage.
Any successful relationship has good communication. Planning a big event like a wedding is a good time to work on communication skills with your fiancé. After you announce the proposal and before the wedding planning train pulls out of the station. Sit down with your fiancé and really talk about what expectations you both have for the wedding. Don’t make assumptions. Ask them if they want a big wedding, what elements of the wedding do they want to have input on. You might think you are the same page when it comes to what your ideal wedding looks like;but you may not be. Taking the time and having the conversation and really listening to your fiancé could give you valuable insight as to what they really want and how they feel. That is the whole point of communication allowing the other person to express their thoughts and feelings and letting them feel heard.
So,you’ve sat down and talked about what kind of wedding you both want. During that conversation you learn that maybe they want a live band, when you want a DJ or they want small intimate wedding on the beach when you’ve always dream of a big church wedding. This is where compromise comes in. Throughout your life with this person there are going to be times when you are going to have to make concessions on what you want for what they want or for what is best for both of you. Compromise doesn’t mean you sacrifice your own happiness or what you want for someone else that is martyrdom. Compromise is finding a happy middle ground where you both get something you want and you both give up something for the bigger picture.Planning your wedding is great way to practice the art of compromise. If they are willing to give you, your church wedding, you can let them have a live band. It’s all about give and take. Then once your married and bigger decisions need to be made you guys will have plenty of practice compromising and finding a happy medium that works for both of you.
Collaboration is essential in planning any event, you collaborate with a florist on centerpieces and floral design, you collaborate with a bakery on your cake, or a graphic designer on your invitations. You call on these experts to help guide you, and bring your vision for your wedding into reality. So why not collaborate with your fiancé? If they are good with details and organization let them take the lead on keeping track of all the addresses and guests names for the invitations, or put them in charge of proofreading the program and written materials. If they could careless about flowers, and decor then you can take the lead in that department. When you collaborate both of you feel apart of the process and you are both playing to your individual strengths. Marriage is about team work and partnership. Your future spouse will be there with you to help you navigate life’s ups and downs. If you can learn to utilize your individual strengths, and work together life’s curveballs will be that much easier to handle.
Your wedding day is just one day in a whole lifetime of days together. It’s the starting line not the finish. While your planning your big day, focusing on all the details don’t lose sight of the bigger picture, your life together. Use this time to not only plan a fabulous event but to work on the skills you need to build a wonderful life together!